The Ghost

The Ghost
from Thirteen Black Roses: Gothic Romantic Poetry by Christopher Courtley

As I walk the sodden banks of this river of human souls
That hurry onward to their common destiny
I observe them as they say their lines and play their little roles
And dance to the tune of a tragic symphony.

I haunt your world like a ghost mourning the life it lost
A shadow watching from the corners of your envied existence
For I cannot cross the river you have crossed
And so there lies between us an infinite distance.

But sometimes in the ocean depths of your eyes
I can see the shimmer of a shining yesterday
Like something you just couldn't exorcise
That left its silver lining amid the grey.

As through this carnival of souls I move unhurried
The baggage of my former life left far behind
Gone but not forgotten, though deeply buried
A priceless treasure none will ever find.

In the masked and painted faces of the figures passing by
I read a thousand books that say the same damned thing
A thousand different ways, and with a lonely sigh
I seek the solace solitude will bring.

So here I stand alone, and here alone I stay
I cannot enter your world, nor will you enter mine
My one remaining hope is that one day
They will once again collide and recombine.

And sometimes in the ocean depths of your eyes
I can see the shimmer of a shining yesterday
Like something you just couldn't exorcise
That left its silver lining amid the grey.

My very talented friend Chris wrote this poem. It is haunting me this evening. It has touched my soul. I am broken today, open, weeping. My father, I discover, has stage 4 lung cancer. He has been given 3-5 years to live. Radiation and chemotherapy.

I am at work when I find out. It is lunch time. I put down the phone. It does not hit me right away. 10 minutes later I am overwhelmed. I am open. I understand. He won't live to be an old man like my grandfather and his grandfather.

He smoked two packs a day. None of us are surprised. Still, it hits me. He is only 68 this year. I hope he gets the 5 years. I want him to know all about my life. I want to tell him all the things I never told him. I want us to be on the same side of the river.

The thing I know is that I weep for knowing the ending.

You can read more of Chris's lovely poetry by downloading his book for free at Smashwords.

Peter Steele Memorial

Did you know an oak tree was planted in memory of Peter Steele? 

An OAK tree! How cool is that?

“On November 21, 2011, an oak tree was planted in Prospect Park to commemorate Steele by fans, who also have a Facebook group “Peter’s Tree.” Read about it here. There is also a bench close by dedicated to him that reads: “In Memory of the Green Man Peter ‘Steele’ Ratajczyk 1962-2010.”

From the article in Park Slope Patch March 7, 2013

“For me, trees have always been the most penetrating preachers. I revere them when they live in tribes and families, in forests and groves. And even more I revere them when they stand alone. They are like lonely persons. Not like hermits who have stolen away out of some weakness, but like great, solitary men, like Beethoven and Nietzsche. In their highest boughs the world rustles, their roots rest in infinity; but they do not lose themselves there, they struggle with all the force of their lives for one thing only: to fulfill themselves according to their own laws, to build up their own form, to represent themselves. Nothing is holier, nothing is more exemplary than a beautiful, strong tree.”

From Bäume. Betrachtungen und Gedichte by Herman Hesse

 Nobody sang like you. You are loved and remembered.

Moonspell In Toronto

I went to the Voices from the Dark tour last night to see Moonspell and The Foreshadowing at the Annex Wreck Room in Toronto. I ended up at the front of the line an hour and a half before the doors opened because I hadn't had time to go get a ticket beforehand and didn't want to find them sold out if I came too late.

The wait wasn't so bad as the weather was sort of mild. I kept expecting the line to grow but it didn't. By the time the doors opened there couldn't have been more than 30 people waiting with me which took some of the booya out of being first in line.

A short while later the first band came on, Death Wolf, and they happily played to the 10 people standing upfront with them.

The Foreshadowing came next, add 10 more, including me. Kind of disappointing, but didn't keep me from 'feeling it'...

By the time Moonspell came on, almost all the booya I had for the show was gone. I stood up front.

But I just couldn't get into it. There were enough people in the crowd this time to make it seem like a big show, but it simply wasn't a big show. I could feel that most people were there to see Marduk and Inquisition, very traditional black metal bands. Moonspell and The Foreshadowing don't really fall into this category. At least not in my opinion. If Moonspell were to play with, say, Ozzy Osbourne, I'm sure they'd fit in much better.

Anyhoo, glad I went. Moonspell really is an awesome band. See! Picture of me mostly enjoying it!

Neil Gaiman - 'Make Good Art'

Neil Gaiman's Inspirational Commencement Speech at Philadelphia’s University of the Arts is truly wonderful. Love this man.♡

The Crow's Fjord

I am selling my designs via Facebook (for now). I know of a few out there who have managed to abstain from Facebook, (although I don't know why they bother at this point... its like having a telephone, so get over it, but anyway....) so I have made a public page which I hope can be viewed by anyone, even those without a Facebook account. It is here:

https://www.facebook.com/TheCrowsFjord

You can also buy them through sending me a direct email to:

mscorpsecafe@gmail.com

(spammers, please be aware that I have a spam filter and your junk will be deleted at the end of each day and not read by a single soul, so save yourself the bad wyrd and go somewhere else)

Here's a print ad I created for a magazine which breifly outlines what I've got:

The Metal Alphabet

    I keep finding these silly things and feel compelled to post them. 

Pagans - 1 - Sexy Beasts

This is awesome. Some great facts from archeology about our distant Northern European ancestors dispelling Christian propaganda that took us away from ourselves.